Monday, September 29, 2008

Got Sketch 2

After the sad experienced I just had to pick up pieces were I left up and have to move on...partly my hobby did help me a lot to bounce back and not to brood about it...for the second time I have joined Got Sketch and here are my take on their sketches...there's still 2 sketches to go before it will finally end...

sketch 1

sketch 2

sketch 3

sketch 3 details

sketch 4

sketch 5

sketch 6

Thursday, September 25, 2008

I was finally in pagemap

I'm in the road to recovery and I feel quite happy somehow...kontin lang...when I saw this favorite site of mine...Here

Thanks Ms. Becky Fleck.

I may have lost my precious one...but I gain lots of friends

Yes, been wanting to have a new addition to the family for years...already...after all I'm not getting any younger but we really wanted to have a baby boy...Actually its been twice already since I experienced sort of delayed in my period...unknown to my husband, I would sneak out buying pregnancy test each time I would be delayed just for a day...that was last 6 months ago, after 3 pregnancy test...I failed...after which...another few weeks of delayed and so last August 18, 2008 I tested was weakly positive so I excitedly told my husband about it...counting it I could have been 6 weeks pregnant already...I should not waste my time so I went to my OB after 2.5years and excitedly showed her the result of my frog test...then she said're pregnant and gave me all these usual medicines na pangpakapit...cause of my stressful job and location of work and need lots of those just like with my previous pregnancies.

Then I was so excited to tell my MWG group and my sister friends, but I did not tell my scrapbook friends...want to save it for few weeks though. Then came this call last August 20 from our HK Office that I was advised to work for HK for 2 weeks since my counterpart left after a short stint there...who am I not to obliged...though my husband was quite apprehensive but again we don't have a choice...I might loose my job if I will not heed to their advise...and so I went...I was still part of the idol then for 3 weeks so I packed some stuff for my scrapbooking (why should I not...even if I'm not included...I would still bring some)

I attended first my very 1st time PS-EB and since I really cannot hide my tummy anymore, told some already during the last hour of the event that I am really was expecting,hehehe...and everyone seem so happy for me.

Then when I flew to HK I did not tell my boss about me being pregnant only after a week when the CEO invited me and all the other managers for a welcome dinner party for me, I was asked to drink this beer when I said no and I told them not to be rude about it but merely because I'm pregnant...

Work in HK were more stressful and I was dead homesick already for weeks...I barely slept in the hotel I cant even ate dinner...but I would make myself busy during workdays/daytime so not to feel lonely or sad...but I'm pregnant though...I would hear the heartbeat then so loudly specially when me and my baby were all alone in the I know that he's safe down inside me...

Then came the time that my working schedule was already done I'm really so excited about going home already and see my OB for the scheduled Ultrasound and heartbeat when I arrived I went right away to see my OB...and that was OB was asking me this weird questions and all sort and she said...I'm afraid there's no baby inside the sac...but we'll try next week, maybe there's something wrong with your count then well see from there.

After a week so I went to see my OB again...and so that's it - its finally confirmed...I have an early sign of pregnancy that is weak and its called "blighted ovum"...I was teary eyed then...God knows how much I waited for this time.

Was it my fault, was it because of the time I was away that I did not take care of myself while away and out of the country...did I stress myself so many questions...I dont want to answer it anymore...I only knew that I will not going to have a baby...just yet...but I kept him for 2 weeks still...he was actually almost 3 months then before he was finally taken out.

Now I was quite ashamed of me and I was really so in pain...specially when the day was almost drowning nearer for me to have this D&C (this I really dont know what it stands for) but its basically has something to do in taking out all the signs of the ovum inside my tummy- raspa in our dialect...then it dawned only then on me...the he's really gone...and the questions came again and again...was it me?

I happened to tell two of my scrapbooking friend...I remembered then that they too experienced what I just had...actually they have even they understand what I'm having through. One was so kind enough to ask for prayers...that I couldn't afford...cause don't have them to think what I've been thinking...was it me...and their words were so kind, so endearing, so uplifting, so much love...little did I know that in this group...its not only for the love of the craft that were all together...there's more to it and that's friendship and caring...

I'm in the road to recovery and it's actually quite been easy for their are people who help me carry this burden and inspires me and push me and make me realize...its not all my's never been the mother's fault why such thing has to happen and one message that struck me most...God love us so much and He never meant to hurt us...He will never hurt us...and so there I was so much inspired...crying inside though...the hurt is there...but I'm not in pain anymore...for I know there are people out there who cares for me and understands what I have been through and I feel so love...I may have lost my precious one...yet I again treasures of friends for keeps.

Salamat talaga.

Monday, September 15, 2008

Week 3 of Scrappin Mom's

I was still included on the Week 3 challenge last August 29 with a Theme called a day in the life of someone dear to you...I was really quite feel the pressure was on already, cause I don't have much pictures...good thing with our high technology...i was able to access my home-base PC in our office and pick some pictures that showed movements...that I remember those pictures when Hannah started to walk. She was actually a late bloomer, she walked all by herself when she was already 13th month old - unlike her big sister who started walking before she turn 1.

Luckily I was so privilege that there was one fellow scrappin moms' idol who help me out edit my photos since prior to this week my photo was really not so good...I was so happy and very much thankful...cause actually I dont want to put an impression that I dont take this contest seriously and I would be very unfair to the people behind this contest...they really did a-hell-of-a-job (grabe to the max)- - - up to now, I'm still hands down with them.

Anyway, when the announcement were made for those ladies who made it to the next round week 4, I actually do not feel disappointed at all, honestly, because I already felt honored to be considered on the day 1 when this started...being part of Week 1 to 3- were really such a privilege and I was able also to cope up with homesickness and be able to finished 4 layouts while I was away in Manila.

Hence, it was really fun-filled journey and if given a chance I will still definitely join the ride again...congratulations to Scrappinmoms' undying support for the craft - you really help us hone our talents and congratulations to the mom's who are already winners in their own right...and of course for the one true Idol in the last stretch of this congratulations in advance...(Me-anne:thinking of few names already)- Hehehe...basta aja...aja.